[ as if they haven't been doing the same thing. They're aware of the hypocrisy, and doubly aware of how flimsy this preface is, but coming out and saying they want to stay with him because they like being around him is infinitely more embarrassing.
Not that it keeps them from shifting on their feet and looking away as they continue. ]
So... You should let me stay with you. [ a beat as their cheeks start to redden. ] I-I'll keep away so you don't get any poison on you, but that way, if something happens -- I'll protect you this time. I owe you that much...
yeah, he could point out that with the mandatory sleep, cinnabar's presence won't increase his chances of survival at all, but he knows that's not the point.]
All right. I usually stay in the air area around this time, if that's fine with you.
[ they still expect to be turned down; it's safer to expect the worst all the time. When the rejection doesn't come, though, they look up at him, clearly surprised.
Then again, he already stayed with them once, didn't he? Maybe they shouldn't be so surprised. Maybe it's okay to believe that he actually likes their company, too, and doesn't just feel sorry for them. ]
... Fine. If that's where you want to go... I'll go with you.
[ at some point, they already started trusting him and believing him. They're sure it won't last. They'll end up failing him or hurting him or something or other, and they'll regret all of this. Those worries are ever-present, niggling at the back of their mind, but it's been a long millenium of life nearly alone, and just as they'd been easily swept up in Phos's bull-headed attempts to make a difference, they're even more easily drawn into his comforting kindness. The part of them that wants to grab onto that comfort is stronger than the part that wants to run, for once.
They lift their eyes, face still a little flushed from the ongoing shame of putting themself on the line. ]
... If you wake up during the night, leave a note in my pocket.
[ they won't pretend they think he'll be able to rouse them, too. They know how things have gone in the past. ]
[ Cinnabar is way too cynical to believe things will go that nicely. They won't make him promise to live or be safe. There's no point. All of it is out of their control - both his and theirs. Waiting and praying are the only options left to them - as usual for a gem. They won't even tell him they'll do the same unless he asks. ]
[ red eyes glance up to meet his in faint surprise - don't tell them he can hear their thoughts, too? - but they're quick to follow it with a nod, a lifting feeling filling their chest. ]
... Mm. If you want.
[ would he miss them if they were gone? He might be the first one. Or the second, if they consider Phos... They wonder if Phos even remembers how they felt anymore. Not that it matters now; they walk over to stand next to him, timidly keeping several feet between them, as usual. ]
... Did Lune ever give you that "something" you wanted, Shess?
[ at that, they simply click their tongue. They're not sold on Lune's company yet. ]
Glue to fix my body when it broke. He gave me more powder, too. [ glancing over at him from the corner of their eyes. ] ... Not as important as whatever you got. All of mine was free.
For those who are used to fixing themselves up quickly, it probably occurs to them more naturally to do so. Humans are more likely to assume their injuries will last for a long while.
[ point PROVEN!! It seems hard to be a human and live in the human world. Cinnabar might be related to them, but the differences seem more numerous than similarities.
Maybe that's why Shess isn't so hard to talk to. They look over his way again, curious, tinged with shyness, as ever. ]
... You don't sleep. So on Thursdays, what happens to you?
I would, too. Memories are all people like us have.
[ immortals, that is. They don't want to lose any of them. They're not like Phos, who treats their body (and consequently, their memories) so carelessly. ]
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[ as if they haven't been doing the same thing. They're aware of the hypocrisy, and doubly aware of how flimsy this preface is, but coming out and saying they want to stay with him because they like being around him is infinitely more embarrassing.
Not that it keeps them from shifting on their feet and looking away as they continue. ]
So... You should let me stay with you. [ a beat as their cheeks start to redden. ] I-I'll keep away so you don't get any poison on you, but that way, if something happens -- I'll protect you this time. I owe you that much...
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yeah, he could point out that with the mandatory sleep, cinnabar's presence won't increase his chances of survival at all, but he knows that's not the point.]
All right. I usually stay in the air area around this time, if that's fine with you.
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Then again, he already stayed with them once, didn't he? Maybe they shouldn't be so surprised. Maybe it's okay to believe that he actually likes their company, too, and doesn't just feel sorry for them. ]
... Fine. If that's where you want to go... I'll go with you.
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[ ... ]
... If you're there... wherever's fine. I'm tired of the night... of being alone.
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I'll do my best to be worthy company, then.
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[ at some point, they already started trusting him and believing him. They're sure it won't last. They'll end up failing him or hurting him or something or other, and they'll regret all of this. Those worries are ever-present, niggling at the back of their mind, but it's been a long millenium of life nearly alone, and just as they'd been easily swept up in Phos's bull-headed attempts to make a difference, they're even more easily drawn into his comforting kindness. The part of them that wants to grab onto that comfort is stronger than the part that wants to run, for once.
They lift their eyes, face still a little flushed from the ongoing shame of putting themself on the line. ]
... If you wake up during the night, leave a note in my pocket.
[ they won't pretend they think he'll be able to rouse them, too. They know how things have gone in the past. ]
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I'll try. Though, depending on how things go, I can't make any promises.
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[ Cinnabar is way too cynical to believe things will go that nicely. They won't make him promise to live or be safe. There's no point. All of it is out of their control - both his and theirs. Waiting and praying are the only options left to them - as usual for a gem. They won't even tell him they'll do the same unless he asks. ]
... I'll be satisfied with trying, for now.
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... Mm. If you want.
[ would he miss them if they were gone? He might be the first one. Or the second, if they consider Phos... They wonder if Phos even remembers how they felt anymore. Not that it matters now; they walk over to stand next to him, timidly keeping several feet between them, as usual. ]
... Did Lune ever give you that "something" you wanted, Shess?
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Yes. I completed the trade.
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[ they won't ask what he got. If he wants to tell them, he can tell them - but they won't pry. Just having his company is all they want. ]
He's given me some things, too. At least he can be counted on for that much.
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What did you get, if you don't mind me asking?
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Glue to fix my body when it broke. He gave me more powder, too. [ glancing over at him from the corner of their eyes. ] ... Not as important as whatever you got. All of mine was free.
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[ a hum. ]
... Maybe I'm the only one who asked.
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[ point PROVEN!! It seems hard to be a human and live in the human world. Cinnabar might be related to them, but the differences seem more numerous than similarities.
Maybe that's why Shess isn't so hard to talk to. They look over his way again, curious, tinged with shyness, as ever. ]
... You don't sleep. So on Thursdays, what happens to you?
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[ they nod. ]
... I thought they might just put you somewhere... or remove your memories.
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[...]
If those were the other options, then I prefer the forced sleep.
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[ immortals, that is. They don't want to lose any of them. They're not like Phos, who treats their body (and consequently, their memories) so carelessly. ]
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Yes, they are. Even if some may fade over time, they're important things.
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[ a quiet, curious look. ]
... Are you okay?
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