[ their tone is matter of fact, although their eyes are a bit soft, tired. ]
... I don't know a lot about death. But I always see Lune bringing these flowers to those ones that are gone... She'd probably appreciate one from you more than from him. That's all.
[ they admit it easily. But they're sure that they'd like whatever Shess likes, too. They'll bring him something pink next time. Cinnabar comes over to sit next to him, not leaving a huge swath of distance, for once - they trust him, and it feels too cold to put space between them now. ]
Thanks. For taking care of me at the trial again. [ beat. ] ...Did you find the answer you wanted?
... It feels like it was nobody's fault. [ they still blame themself - more after learning what actually happened - but they're not going to get into that again with him. ] I don't like it.
Yet we have no choice but to keep trying to survive.
[ they pause for a few seconds, like they're not sure how to proceed; their words are somewhat clumsy. ]
We might fail. But... I don't regret surviving. You were there. [ if it hadn't been for him, they're not sure what they would have done yesterday night - it wasn't much, but just having someone they felt they could actually talk to was enough. ] I don't believe in happy endings, but I've learned the middle part doesn't have to be so bad... I'm sure that's how it was for her, as well. Humans and gems aren't so different.
[it's almost funny that everyone thinks it's only miki shess cares about when he's upset over most of the deaths this week, but he won't comment on that.]
If people didn't believe the "middle" could be worth it, few would bother to live.
[ cinnabar doesn't know he knows the others well!! they're barely on top of their own social life... ]
...
[ they were one of those few until just barely before they arrived here, but they won't bring up their woes again. They curl their knees up into their chest, resting their chin on them. ]
... That's not it. I... Because you were there, it was worth it. You make it easier just by being with me, in this place... I'm sure I'm not the only one who thinks that. [ a pause; it's a little embarrassing to admit it, but they're feeling pretty numb tonight, luckily. ] However she may have ended, I'm sure being your partner made her happy.
he knows cinnabar is trying hard right now, and he appreciates it, but he's admittedly having difficulty mustering up what the proper response should be to make them happy.]
[ meanwhile, Cinnabar is desperately looking for a way to cheer up Shess and not knowing what that should be or if anything is working... what a mess. ]
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NEVER
he takes it, though—]
What is this for?
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[ their tone is matter of fact, although their eyes are a bit soft, tired. ]
... I don't know a lot about death. But I always see Lune bringing these flowers to those ones that are gone... She'd probably appreciate one from you more than from him. That's all.
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[he's not really the "lay out flowers for the dead" sort, but cinnabar doesn't need to know that.]
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[ a flower of mourning just seemed appropriate, when they didn't know which one would cheer him up. ]
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[ they admit it easily. But they're sure that they'd like whatever Shess likes, too. They'll bring him something pink next time. Cinnabar comes over to sit next to him, not leaving a huge swath of distance, for once - they trust him, and it feels too cold to put space between them now. ]
Thanks. For taking care of me at the trial again. [ beat. ] ...Did you find the answer you wanted?
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[ ... ]
... It feels like it was nobody's fault. [ they still blame themself - more after learning what actually happened - but they're not going to get into that again with him. ] I don't like it.
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Killing isn't so neatly sorted into "someone's fault".
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[ they know it's not that simple by now. ]
... It feels like we're being set up to fail, too.
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[ they pause for a few seconds, like they're not sure how to proceed; their words are somewhat clumsy. ]
We might fail. But... I don't regret surviving. You were there. [ if it hadn't been for him, they're not sure what they would have done yesterday night - it wasn't much, but just having someone they felt they could actually talk to was enough. ] I don't believe in happy endings, but I've learned the middle part doesn't have to be so bad... I'm sure that's how it was for her, as well. Humans and gems aren't so different.
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If people didn't believe the "middle" could be worth it, few would bother to live.
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...
[ they were one of those few until just barely before they arrived here, but they won't bring up their woes again. They curl their knees up into their chest, resting their chin on them. ]
... That's not it. I... Because you were there, it was worth it. You make it easier just by being with me, in this place... I'm sure I'm not the only one who thinks that. [ a pause; it's a little embarrassing to admit it, but they're feeling pretty numb tonight, luckily. ] However she may have ended, I'm sure being your partner made her happy.
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he knows cinnabar is trying hard right now, and he appreciates it, but he's admittedly having difficulty mustering up what the proper response should be to make them happy.]
I don't doubt that.
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Good.
[ they peer over at him again. ]
... I-if you need someone... I'm here.
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