[ they honestly don't remember much. Those days passed in a haze of self-loathing, for the most part; they're sure they were tired, but it was hard to tell where "tired" ended and the uncertainty and despair began, and after a few decades, it all blended together into a gray mush. They might not remember because they don't want to feel the way they did back before they learned how to block out those feelings. ]
[ Cinnabar hums, resting their head on their arms as they slump forward onto the table; the orbs of mercury always orbiting them seem to have calmed down slightly, retaining their round shape, despite how nervous they are about having someone spend this much time with them. ]
[ Hmm. They can't say they can think of anything useful to do with water outside of cleaning things, either. Although his specific ability might be something entirely separate. ]
I haven't even tried to use mine yet, [ they confess. ] It feels like there's no point.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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It's fine. I don't need sleep anyway.
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Oh. [ GOOD GOING, STUPID! They immediately look embarrassed again. ] You never get tired...?
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No. Am I keeping you up, though?
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[ they haven't really... talked about that, but Shess wants to be here, right...? So it's okay to talk to him a little. ]
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[ they honestly don't remember much. Those days passed in a haze of self-loathing, for the most part; they're sure they were tired, but it was hard to tell where "tired" ended and the uncertainty and despair began, and after a few decades, it all blended together into a gray mush. They might not remember because they don't want to feel the way they did back before they learned how to block out those feelings. ]
We don't get sick like humans, either.
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Is it difficult to try and readjust here, then?
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[ their eyes dart back up to him, briefly, then they look away again shyly. ]
... I've never been around this many people. This is probably the most I've spoken to anyone in 700 years.
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Given the difficulty, do you think you would've preferred not going through this?
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[ a pause. ]
You want to go home, too, don't you? Even if it's hard...
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[ Cinnabar still hasn't decided. ]
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[ after a few seconds of hesitating in their usual awkward way, they go to sit down at the table again, the chair miraculously holding their weight. ]
I don't think I can trust them yet, though.
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If you don't sleep... What do you do all night?
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Really...?
[ they still haven't really tried to use theirs... ]
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[ the question seems born of an innocent curiosity rather than any strategic motive. ]
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I haven't even tried to use mine yet, [ they confess. ] It feels like there's no point.
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